Courtesy of Dr. Stud Kickass:

I feel it is my duty to make a public service announcement. It is not Christmas people. Not even close. Okay, so it is close but not close enough. I live by very few rules but the ones I have are hard and fast. Number one don't touch my feet. Strange I know considering my lack of love for footwear (we'll leave the shoe fetish for Nate). Number two is there certain things you need to ask permission prior to "touching". I don't care how far into it you are. You just don't go there without permission (if this is getting past you I'll explain it in person sometime). And number 3 is NO CHRISTMAS MUSIC OR DECORATIONS BEFORE THANKSGIVING! Period. Don't. No exceptions.
Do not let corporate America lure you into thinking it is okay to tacky up your yard just because Halloween is over. Because it isn't. It is our responsibility to maintain some sense of tradition and decorum in this country. It is after all, WE the people. Take a stand. As a tradition following, double standard loving, red meat eating, opening the door for women red blooded American male I feel it is my duty and my right to flog the monkey shit, with a 3 foot section of hose pipe (not garden hose you yankee) out of anyone caught humming, singing, whistling a Christmas song prior to the conclusion of Thanksgiving festivities. Starting today I am forming an Army of sorts. I ask that you all join me in this fight to keep tradition alive! Go out and tell your D-bag neighbor to put his/her/their shit away until next Friday. I will leave some spare three foot sections of hose in the gym for anyone wishing to join my "Guardian Angel's of Christmas" brigade and enact some vigilante justice on the robots who are being mind boned by corporations.
And FYI, wish me a Merry Christmas prior to Nov 25th and your marbles will get a free trip up your gut and into your throat courtesy of my grocery store foot.
Oh, and Happy Thanksgiving.
Dr. Stud Kickass